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This is not intended as a provocative gesture but other people are, as usual, upset. Sensuality does not understand why everyone else is so disturbed by her.

As a young girl, she was often scolded for going barefoot. Sensuality likes to make love at the border where time and space change places.

When she is considering a potential lover, she takes him to the ocean and watches. Does he dance with the waves? Does he tell her about the time he slept on the beach when he was seventeen and woke up in the middle of the night to look at the moon?

Does he laugh and cry and notice how big the sky is? It is spring now, and Sensuality is very much in love these days.

Her new friend is very sweet. Climbing into bed the first time, he confessed he was a little intimidated about making love with her.

Ruth Gendler, The Book of Qualities. Such men are described with a certain facile contempt as lady-killers, but the term has a nugget of truthful observation in it, for in fact all the passionate instincts of the chase are present in their ceaseless vigilance: the stalking of the prey, the excitement and mental cruelty of the kill.

They are constantly on the alert, always ready and willing to follow the trail of an adventure to the very edge of the abyss. They are full of passion all the time, but it is the passion of a gambler rather than a lover, cold, calculating and dangerous.

Some are so persistent that their whole lives, long after their youth is spent, are made an eternal adventure by this expectation.

Each of their days is resolved into hundreds of small sensual experiences - a look exchanged in passing, a fleeting smile, knees brushing together as a couple sit opposite each other - and the year, in its own turn, dissolves into hundreds of such days in which sensuous experience is the constantly flowing, nourishing, inspiring source of life.

I think it should be discovered. To me they are rather vulgar and obvious. Was I the source of your greatest bliss? I celebrate it, and relish the electricity of it, with every fibre of my being.

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Part 1 of Don't equate sensuality with sexuality. While sensuality can enhance sexuality, it can also be non-sexual. Stop thinking about sensuality as having to do only with sex and consider all of the other ways that you can be sensual; standing in the middle of a downpour, dipping strawberries in chocolate, or closing your eyes and listening to your favorite classical music.

Once you let go of your preconceptions about what it means to be sensual, you can feel more freed about your own personal exploration.

However, being sensual in your everyday life and taking the time to enjoy the world around you can make you feel more pleasure in the bedroom for sure.

Take pleasure in your own body. No, this doesn't mean what you're thinking -- it just means that, if you want to be a sensual person, that you have to be comfortable in your own skin first and foremost.

If you're not happy with who you are or how you look, then it'll be much more difficult for you to let go and let your body enjoy the world around you, whether you're kissing your partner or sunbathing on the beach.

Work on building your confidence and self-esteem, and soon, you'll see that you'll be getting more pleasure and joy out of the ordinary things around you.

It just means that you have to love your body and be open to whatever sensations the world may bring it. Slow down. If you really want to be sensual, then you have to stop rushing through your day without stopping to breathe -- or to enjoy the rainbow forming over the clouds.

There's a reason people say that you should "Stop and smell the roses. Leave for work or school fifteen minutes early so you can take it slow and notice the world around you.

Take a walk and look around you instead of texting or being on the phone at all times. If your friend gets up to go the bathroom at a bar, look at the interesting patrons around you instead of logging into your Facebook.

You'll see what a big difference this makes in your ability to indulge in the world around you. Part of the reason you may find it hard to slow down is because your days are so packed that you don't have a moment to breathe.

See what you can cut down on to free up some time just for enjoying the world around you. If this sounds ridiculous, make slightly more concrete plans; decide to watch the sunset, enjoy a bottle of wine with a friend, or go to an outdoor concert.

Look for new ways to indulge your senses. Sensual people are always looking to take a bigger bite out of life. Don't just try to enjoy the same old things you've been doing, but find new ways to use your senses and to experience the world.

Go on a long hike and stop and look at the flora and fauna, go wine tasting with your partner, or cook a long and savory breakfast instead of your usual granola bar on the go.

Think about something you've always wanted to do, whether it's mountain biking or taking photos of the roses in the beautiful garden in your town, and make a plan to actually accomplish it.

It does mean that you should always be open to new sensory experiences, though. Be present. If you want to be sensual, then you have to learn to live in the present and to take each day as it comes.

Don't spend all day fretting about something that will happen three months from now or regretting something you said a week ago.

It's just not worth it and it won't change anything. Instead, enjoy the day you're in, look around you, get some fresh air, and take pleasure in even the ordinary conversations you may be having with your coworkers.

Learn to live in the moment and you'll be able to take the time to experience sensory pleasure. Whether you're taking the bus home or sitting at work, take the time to notice the world around you.

What is the weather like? What do you see outside your window? What do you smell? What do you hear? How many details can you write down about the present moment?

Getting in the habit of asking yourself these details can help you live in the present. Spend more time doing the things that excite you.

Don't feel guilty about doing things that actually make you feel good and happy. This can mean having sex with your partner more often, taking the time to cook a delicious meal even if you're short on time, or playing your favorite record in the morning when you wake up.

You're not hurting anybody by spending more time indulging in your favorite pleasures, and you're becoming a more sensual person in the process.

Think about what an average week in your life looks like. Are there things you can cut out, like watching lame TV shows, in favor of doing something you really love, like taking a yoga class or painting in the gardens near your home?

Part 2 of Play with your hair. Spend more time brushing your hair, tossing your hair back, running your fingers through your hair, and just enjoying the feeling of your hair on your head.

When you're in the shower, take the time to massage shampoo and conditioner into your scalp and enjoy the feeling of running your fingers through your locks.

This will help you indulge in one of the most amazing parts of your body. And if you have a partner, playing with his or her hair will add a sensual touch to your relationship.

Spend more time in the shower. Of course, there is a difference between only living for pleasure also called hedonism and mindfully choosing to enjoy pleasure.

Yes, it is possible to misuse sensuality — but not if you have a clear intention and make self-care your priority.

When we learn what feels good on a sensual level, we become more embodied as human beings and therefore more capable of being sexually confident.

So if you struggle with a sexual insecurity or shyness, get into your body! My recommendation is that you learn how to enjoy all of your five senses and embrace sensuality as a regular and intentional part of your life.

If you would like to become a more embodied human being who is capable of fully owning your sexuality, try creating a daily sensuality practice.

Choose one of your senses taste, touch, sight, smell or hearing and explore what brings you pleasure. Here are some helpful ideas.

Do note that while some of these ideas might sound silly or commonplace, they are shared in the context of mindfully and intentionally experiencing them.

Give yourself a massage with your hands or a tennis ball. You can sit against a wall and roll the tennis ball up and down your back.

Get a professional massage and experiment with the different options. For example, you might choose to get a Thai foot massage one week, and then a hot stone back massage on another occasion.

Buy some silky body lotion or body butter and apply to your body at night. Focus on the sensation of the liquid against your skin. Experiment with self-pleasure.

Try stretching different areas of your body and notice which parts experience the most relief. Get your partner to softly touch different areas of your body.

Notice which areas increase your pulse. Periodically taste it as you cook it to get the flavor just right. Bake a delicious dessert for yourself.

How does it taste? Try oil pulling every morning oil pulling is the ancient practice of using oil to increase oral hygiene. Focus on the feeling of swishing oil around in your mouth.

Experiment with eating your food in different ways, e. Which voices do you like listening to the most? Find music from a different culture, e.

Irish, Spanish, German, Indian. How do you feel when you listen to it? Take what you need, and leave the rest. Sensuality is a practice we can introduce into nearly any moment of the day.

By becoming more embodied, we become more capable of experiencing sexual confidence. You might also wish to journal about how your sensuality practice slowly influences your sex life.

What are your favorite ways of being sensual? Please share below! Mateo Sol is a prominent psychospiritual teacher whose work has influenced the lives of millions globally.

Born into a family with a history of drug addiction, abuse, and mental illness, Mateo Sol was taught about the plight of the human condition from a young age.

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I love to smell nice and take care of myself… I am kinda a clean freak but I love everything smelling great… It makes me feel really good.

Also stroking something soft or sleep with something soft to hold. Wearing loose clothing that is soft on my body.

Or just looking at my cats playing or sleeping.

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